Innocence — a short story
Hi. My name is Elizabeth. Except I don’t like that name. It sounds so big and grown-up, not like me. So as soon as I started kindergarten I asked my teachers to call me Lizzy. And now everyone does, except my parents of course. They still call me Elizabeth ‘cause that’s what they named me.
I’m 7. Right now it’s summer. But when school starts again I’ll be a 2nd grader. I can’t wait. I really like school. I know a lot of kids who don’t, but summer time is so boring for me. I don’t get to see my friends from school, and there’s not much to do at my house. Both my parents are teachers, and my dad even works in the summer because he teaches at the college, so we don’t go on vacations much.
So its summer now and I’ve got nothing to do. I’ve already spent all morning drawing, which I love to do. And then I played with my Barbies some, but after I set up the house and arranged my Barbie furniture, I’m bored already. There’s not many other girls my age that live on my street to play with. Besides, I’m the shy one and I don’t have a lot of friends. That’s what my mom always says when we meet new people. She says Kristen (my sister) is outgoing, but Elizabeth is the shy one. Since she says it, it must be true. So I try to act shy as much as possible and I don’t talk much.
My mom sees that I am bored. She says “Why don’t you go down the street to Adam’s house to play? His parents are very nice, and they’re Christian.” She is always trying to get me to be friends with other kids who have parents that go to our church. I can tell that my parents think that Christians, especially the ones at our church, are special people. If they go to our church, they must be nice. I can tell my parents think that. Except I don’t always like the kids that are there. Just because my parents like those parents, does that mean I have to like the kids?
My mom is still talking, “I’ll call Adam’s mom. I’m sure she’ll be okay with you coming over. She told me Adam didn’t have much to do today either. You can even walk over there and she’ll call me when you get there.” This is exciting to me, ‘cause my mom hardly ever lets me go anywhere alone. I’ll be like a 5th grader!
So I walk to Adam’s house. When I get there his parents are in the living room. They smile at me and are real nice. His mom says, “Go right in Lizzy. Adam and Gretchen are already playing in his room.”
Gretchen?! This is news to me. I know Gretchen. She’s a year younger than Adam and I. She’s going into 1st grade. I’m not so sure about playing with her. It’s not because she’s younger but, well, there’s something about her. But I go down the hall to Adam’s room and knock on the door.
Adam opens the door and gives me a big grin when he sees me. That makes me feel good. Gretchen stops what she is doing and eyes me suspiciously. “What’s she doing here?” she asks, not so nicely. I give her a look of mine---my dad calls it the “evil eye”.
“It’s okay,” Adam tells her. “Lizzy is cool.” Again, I feel good. “What are you playing?” I ask. “House,” Adam says. “I’m the dad and Gretchen is already the mom. So you can be the doggie or the baby.” “Okay,” I sigh. Since I am the littlest girl in our grade, I never get to be the mom. I usually have to be the baby, but since Adam gave me a choice I’ll pick the doggie. Puppies are cute! “Arf arf!” I say jumping up and down. Gretchen and Adam both giggle and I feel happy that they like my doggie act.
We play for a while and it is fun. Adam pretends to go to work and come home. Gretchen cooks dinner and I fetch the newspaper. Then we get bored. “Let’s play a new game,” Adam says. “What?” I ask. “I know, Operation!” Adam smiles. Gretchen smiles too. I think, this must be a game they’ve played together before, but I never have. “How do you play?” I ask. Adam explains, “Gretchen lies down on the operating table,” he points to the bed “and I examine her.” Then we switch. You can have a turn too. “Okay,” I say, happy to be part of their game.
Gretchen lies down on the bed and Adam takes out his doctor toys. He has a thermometer, a tongue stick, a bunch of real band aides, a pretend shot, and a thing for listening to the heart. “Okay,” he says to Gretchen, “now pull your pants down.”
“Wait,” I say. Something doesn’t feel right to me about now. “Are you sure that’s okay?” “Sure,” he says, “we do it all the time.” Gretchen smiles at me. I want Adam and Gretchen to be my friends, so I say, “Um, okay but I don’t think I will play. I’ll just watch.” Adam sends Gretchen a look. I am not sure what that means. “Okay, sure,” he says.
Gretchen pulls her pants down. I feel a little weird, but okay. I mean, I have a little sister and we take baths together all the time. So I know it’s okay for girls to see each other naked. Adam touches her privates. Her eyes are closed and she has a funny look on her face. I start to feel not good. I close my eyes but still stay in the same spot.
I hear Adam say, “Okay, my turn.” I open my eyes. Gretchen is dressed and Adam is getting onto the bed. Before he pulls his pants down I start to feel kinda sick. I am looking at them, but without turning around I remember Adam has tall windows in his room that are behind me. The windows have long drapes with fabric that hangs down from the ceiling to the floor. I quickly speak and move at the same time, “You can go ahead but I am going to hide behind the curtains.”
I am behind the curtains already. I can’t see anything. I hear Adam say “Lizzy, you have to look. That’s part of the game!” “No thanks,” I say. I can hear moving. “Gretchen, get Lizzy and make her look.” I can tell that Adam and Gretchen are moving toward me. Adam says to her “Pull your pants down too, make her look!” I look down at the floor and see their feet. They both are very close to me, with their pants down at their ankles. I close my eyes shut and put my hands over them. Adam and Gretchen reach for me behind the curtain. They grab my arms and try to peel them away from my face. My heart is beating so fast, I must get away. I try to remember how far it is to the door. In a split second with my eyes still closed, I kick at them with my feet, push them down with my hands, and run towards the door. When I am almost there I open my eyes to see the door knob. Out of the corner of my eye I see their movement and hear Adam shouting, “Gretchen, get her! Don’t let her escape! Lizzy, if you tell anyone, I’ll kill you!”
I run out of Adam’s room, down the hall, into the living room where his mom and dad are sitting. They look up surpised and I quickly say, panting, “I have to go home now!” Before they can speak I run to the front door, and down the street to my own house. I shove open the door and start towards my room. I hear my mom in the kitchen, “Lizzie, is that you? Did you have a nice time?” “Yes,” I manage to say before turning the corner to the hallway to my room. When I get to my room I close the door behind me, and lean against it, trying to catch my breath. I am shaking all over.
I don’t tell anyone what happened at Adam’s house. He said he will kill me if I did. My parents wouldn’t believe me anyway. My dad would say maybe I made a mistake and didn’t understand. My mom would say it was all in my head. They would both say that Adam and his parents are very nice Christian people, and don’t do things like that. They will say I am a bad girl for thinking that way. I guess I am a bad girl. If my parents say it, it must be true.
- end -
I’m 7. Right now it’s summer. But when school starts again I’ll be a 2nd grader. I can’t wait. I really like school. I know a lot of kids who don’t, but summer time is so boring for me. I don’t get to see my friends from school, and there’s not much to do at my house. Both my parents are teachers, and my dad even works in the summer because he teaches at the college, so we don’t go on vacations much.
So its summer now and I’ve got nothing to do. I’ve already spent all morning drawing, which I love to do. And then I played with my Barbies some, but after I set up the house and arranged my Barbie furniture, I’m bored already. There’s not many other girls my age that live on my street to play with. Besides, I’m the shy one and I don’t have a lot of friends. That’s what my mom always says when we meet new people. She says Kristen (my sister) is outgoing, but Elizabeth is the shy one. Since she says it, it must be true. So I try to act shy as much as possible and I don’t talk much.
My mom sees that I am bored. She says “Why don’t you go down the street to Adam’s house to play? His parents are very nice, and they’re Christian.” She is always trying to get me to be friends with other kids who have parents that go to our church. I can tell that my parents think that Christians, especially the ones at our church, are special people. If they go to our church, they must be nice. I can tell my parents think that. Except I don’t always like the kids that are there. Just because my parents like those parents, does that mean I have to like the kids?
My mom is still talking, “I’ll call Adam’s mom. I’m sure she’ll be okay with you coming over. She told me Adam didn’t have much to do today either. You can even walk over there and she’ll call me when you get there.” This is exciting to me, ‘cause my mom hardly ever lets me go anywhere alone. I’ll be like a 5th grader!
So I walk to Adam’s house. When I get there his parents are in the living room. They smile at me and are real nice. His mom says, “Go right in Lizzy. Adam and Gretchen are already playing in his room.”
Gretchen?! This is news to me. I know Gretchen. She’s a year younger than Adam and I. She’s going into 1st grade. I’m not so sure about playing with her. It’s not because she’s younger but, well, there’s something about her. But I go down the hall to Adam’s room and knock on the door.
Adam opens the door and gives me a big grin when he sees me. That makes me feel good. Gretchen stops what she is doing and eyes me suspiciously. “What’s she doing here?” she asks, not so nicely. I give her a look of mine---my dad calls it the “evil eye”.
“It’s okay,” Adam tells her. “Lizzy is cool.” Again, I feel good. “What are you playing?” I ask. “House,” Adam says. “I’m the dad and Gretchen is already the mom. So you can be the doggie or the baby.” “Okay,” I sigh. Since I am the littlest girl in our grade, I never get to be the mom. I usually have to be the baby, but since Adam gave me a choice I’ll pick the doggie. Puppies are cute! “Arf arf!” I say jumping up and down. Gretchen and Adam both giggle and I feel happy that they like my doggie act.
We play for a while and it is fun. Adam pretends to go to work and come home. Gretchen cooks dinner and I fetch the newspaper. Then we get bored. “Let’s play a new game,” Adam says. “What?” I ask. “I know, Operation!” Adam smiles. Gretchen smiles too. I think, this must be a game they’ve played together before, but I never have. “How do you play?” I ask. Adam explains, “Gretchen lies down on the operating table,” he points to the bed “and I examine her.” Then we switch. You can have a turn too. “Okay,” I say, happy to be part of their game.
Gretchen lies down on the bed and Adam takes out his doctor toys. He has a thermometer, a tongue stick, a bunch of real band aides, a pretend shot, and a thing for listening to the heart. “Okay,” he says to Gretchen, “now pull your pants down.”
“Wait,” I say. Something doesn’t feel right to me about now. “Are you sure that’s okay?” “Sure,” he says, “we do it all the time.” Gretchen smiles at me. I want Adam and Gretchen to be my friends, so I say, “Um, okay but I don’t think I will play. I’ll just watch.” Adam sends Gretchen a look. I am not sure what that means. “Okay, sure,” he says.
Gretchen pulls her pants down. I feel a little weird, but okay. I mean, I have a little sister and we take baths together all the time. So I know it’s okay for girls to see each other naked. Adam touches her privates. Her eyes are closed and she has a funny look on her face. I start to feel not good. I close my eyes but still stay in the same spot.
I hear Adam say, “Okay, my turn.” I open my eyes. Gretchen is dressed and Adam is getting onto the bed. Before he pulls his pants down I start to feel kinda sick. I am looking at them, but without turning around I remember Adam has tall windows in his room that are behind me. The windows have long drapes with fabric that hangs down from the ceiling to the floor. I quickly speak and move at the same time, “You can go ahead but I am going to hide behind the curtains.”
I am behind the curtains already. I can’t see anything. I hear Adam say “Lizzy, you have to look. That’s part of the game!” “No thanks,” I say. I can hear moving. “Gretchen, get Lizzy and make her look.” I can tell that Adam and Gretchen are moving toward me. Adam says to her “Pull your pants down too, make her look!” I look down at the floor and see their feet. They both are very close to me, with their pants down at their ankles. I close my eyes shut and put my hands over them. Adam and Gretchen reach for me behind the curtain. They grab my arms and try to peel them away from my face. My heart is beating so fast, I must get away. I try to remember how far it is to the door. In a split second with my eyes still closed, I kick at them with my feet, push them down with my hands, and run towards the door. When I am almost there I open my eyes to see the door knob. Out of the corner of my eye I see their movement and hear Adam shouting, “Gretchen, get her! Don’t let her escape! Lizzy, if you tell anyone, I’ll kill you!”
I run out of Adam’s room, down the hall, into the living room where his mom and dad are sitting. They look up surpised and I quickly say, panting, “I have to go home now!” Before they can speak I run to the front door, and down the street to my own house. I shove open the door and start towards my room. I hear my mom in the kitchen, “Lizzie, is that you? Did you have a nice time?” “Yes,” I manage to say before turning the corner to the hallway to my room. When I get to my room I close the door behind me, and lean against it, trying to catch my breath. I am shaking all over.
I don’t tell anyone what happened at Adam’s house. He said he will kill me if I did. My parents wouldn’t believe me anyway. My dad would say maybe I made a mistake and didn’t understand. My mom would say it was all in my head. They would both say that Adam and his parents are very nice Christian people, and don’t do things like that. They will say I am a bad girl for thinking that way. I guess I am a bad girl. If my parents say it, it must be true.
- end -
posted by suzi b at 9:46 PM
2 Comments:
Suzi, that story gave me chills. You're a good writer.
Thank you! I need that kind of support right now, to get me going on this writing and creativity stuff. Suggestions and constructive criticism is welcome too. Let's see what else I can come up with! :-)
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